Change

The last few weeks have been full of ups and downs.  The world is changing around me and I am having to think about changes in my life that will undo the joy I have found recently.  I have until November to find a job or I have to re certify, and I am starting to sweat.  There just are not that many jobs available in our area and my family is pushing and urging me to take any position in Texas that I am offered.  The idea of leaving my best friend (again), and my new family is very disruptive to my current state of happiness.  I try to hold on to a positive outlook, but the reality is,  I might have to move away.

I play the scenario in my head and wonder if, when, and howIf I end up moving away...
If I move can I make this work....
When will I get to see my BFF and family.....
How the HELL is this going to work!!!!!!


All the changes have put me back into that place where I just want to curl up and cry...again
I AM SO TIRED OF WANTING/NEEDING TO CRY........


I have found a much needed happy place, and it looks like that might be changing.  Sometimes I wish I was Scarlet, "I can't think about this now.  I'll go crazy if I do.  I'll think about it tomorrow."  The only problem is that today is tomorrow.  I have to think about it now.  I really, really don't want to.  The idea of leaving hurts too much. 
 
Some one, some where, came up with this bright idea that change was good..... I have to wonder if that same person also invented pantyhose?  They are very nice, smooth, and sexy for a while, until you get a runner!  Then all you have is a hand full of silky trash.